Static Caravan In North Wales 2004 - By Ren Withnell

3 nights in a static caravan in North Wales...ooooh how exciting!! Friday morning I load up those things not at the gf's, check the bike over and try to think of what I had forgotten. I arrived at the gf's and we started to load the bike. You would be very suprised at just how heavy 2 saddlebags can be when filled by a woman. Along with the bags came the hairdryer, straighteners and of course the makeup. With the bike loaded it looked like we were off round the world, not for 3 nights in Wales.

We set off into the great big world with a wobble. Actually the bike felt fine loaded, just needing a little more input to control. We started on the motorway but soon turned off to travel through Warrington and Frodsham. We both find motorways nice and quick, but not very interesting. We eventually stopped off at a roadside van for a bacon butty and some hot tea. Onwards to Wales, next stop is between Flint and Prestatyn

Last time we were here we'd seen a ship, seemingly parked on the beach and visible from the A548 coast road from Flint to Prestatyn. Curious as we are at such odd things, we stopped to have a look. There was no obvious way to get to it. Further investigation in the nearby textile shop informed us we could not get close by. It seems it was to be a casino and nightclub but the venture failed and is now a rusty storage space for the local market. Another mystery solved.

On to the caravan. Last time we were out of season, perhaps 20 people in total on the site. This time we are in season and what a difference, not really for the good. It was like walking into "Hi-De-Hi" but with caravans instead of chalets. After much sniggering from the gf and myself at the tackiness of it all we settled into our home for the next 3 nights and prepared for a big night out...

The entertainment is aimed at kids. All the cheesy disco music and rather frightening furry mascots you will ever need. Fast food at high prices, slot machines making loud noises and kids dressed like hookers and pimps, it was all to much for my aging head. We found a bar for adults only, to our relief. The relief soon ended when the resident band started. Ever optimistic as we are we returned at 10 for the comedian. Laugh!!!, I almost did!!! Bedtime methinks.

Day 2

For this trip I hoped to see some places rather than get hopelessly lost as usual. As such we followed the main roads and signposts down to Blaenau Ffestiniog. We quickly looked at the train station which has both normal train lines and narrow guage lines which form part of the Ffestiniog Railway. A quick drink and some piccies and we were on our way again.

Narrow and normal guage.

Next stop is Portmerion. This is the town made famous by it's role in "The Prisoner" TV series. It's basically a functional folly of odd brightly coloured houses, shops and a hotel. It's all very pretty in a pleasant cove, but it did nothing for me and I objected to paying £5.70 to see it. I guess I am a philistine but I simply did not "get it". We wanted to see it, now we have seen it, job done.

A strange place.

Off again just a short hop to Porthmadog. This is harbour town which combines modern convenience shops with some pleasing quaint welshness and history. We had a pub lunch and sat watching the harbour for a while.

Just watching the boats...

Another short hop to Criccieth. I holidayed here almost every year of my childhood and we sought out the hotel I used to stay in. There it was still as remember it. I reminisced for a while then went to the beach. The gf tried to skim stones but proved to be worse than I ever imagined. It was quite fun watching a grown woman get frustrated with stones going "plop" rather than "skim". I can mock as I laid out several 6-7-8 bounce skimmers. It's a shame when all I can impress the gf with is my skimming skills.

Plop!!...again...

We started the return journey and soon I was feeling the miles. We stopped for fuel and drinks occasionally and arrived back late teatime. I was travel waery but the gf was still "up for it" so we went out later, but returned quickly after discovering the entertainment was still dire. We slept well.

Day 3

Anglesey this time. Breakfast arrived later than expected with problems getting the gf out of bed. This is an ongoing problem with no resolution in sight. Fed and watered we made our way down the A55 again following the main routes to avoid getting lost. The Menai Bridge is the smaller but more attractive bridge into Anglesey, take it of you can. Another drink and photo stop at the bridge then on again to Beaumaris.

Engineering beauty

Beaumaris is everything Portmerion should have been. It's a small, old and beautiful town. There's a castle, lifeboat station, views and an old prison as well. Regrettably still being at the start of the season both the prison and castle were shut, much to my dissapointment. Again we sat at the beach while we put the world to rights, looking over the Menai Straight into the Welsh Mountains, drinking now flat pop from it's bottle and watching the tide come in.

Beautiful Beaumaris Beach

We headed inland a short while but nature called so we stopped for tea and relief at a garden center. This garden center can honestly boast the poshest and cleanest toilet I've seen in some time, it was a privilige and honour to park my load there. I made sure I left it as clean and tidy as I found it, but the smell was beyond my control. We had planned to go to Holyhead but time and energy were against us, so we made our way to Llanfairpwllgwngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch. Don't belive me...see the picture.

HA!!

We then made our way to a ford near Minffordd. A pleasing ford with concrete bottom and at this time about 4 inches of water. We took piccies and watched some kids riding through time and again on thier pushbikes getting soaking wet. Another ford done, but to do every ford on wetroads.com we still have over a thousand to do...

Minffordd Ford...SPLASH!!

On to Llandudno, getting a little lost and disorientated on the tiny peninsula. We were very happy to sit on the pebble beach, again watching the tide while chatting. Rested and refreshed we set off back to the caravan. Like a fool I thought I'd leave petrol to the last minute, fill up on reserve. The tank range on this bike is pathetic and I hate filling up. Needless to say upon arrival in Prestatyn I thought I would be empty. Plenty of petrol in this town I thought, and no doubt there is....but could I find a station?, could I heckers like. After going through Rhyl and Abergele and getting quite mad with myself for having passed so many staions previously, we finally came upon a supermarket staion. Phew, I had visons of the gf in a taxi buying a can and fuel, oh the shame, oh the cost!

Llandudno Beach

We again ventured out to sample the entertainment, you would think we would learn. We again went back and watched TV in the caravan, we again slept well.

Day 4

And I again struggled to wake sleeping beauty. But today was hometime so we packed up, cleaned the van, took out the rubbish and loaded the bike. We travelled home and took in the unpleasant but interesting sights of industrial Widnes and Warrington. I dropped the gf off at home where she found the house trashed by the kids, so I quickly departed for a brew up at Rivvie. Altogether we'd travelled the best part of 500 miles, stopped briefly at many places and rather enjoyed the freedom. Back to reality now, ho hum.

Wales can still offer some of the best mountain views, superb twisting roads and historical landmarks you'll find. Some places are too touristy, some are plain ugly and some are plain dull. There were an awful lot of roadworks but this being the end of the UK tax year this is to be expected and found everywhere. Rumour has it the Welsh police are overkeen on speeding bikers, but I saw none of this...as I hardly reach speed limits most times. Wales is a place of contrasts with old meeting new. It's not always pleasant but it is always interesting, and the good far outweighs the bad. So go and have a look.

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