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Travel Stories5 Fools In South West Scotland
Homeward Bound And Epilogues
Ride Date 14 June 2025
By Ren Withnell
We did most of the cleaning and packing last night and yet there's still a lot of final cleaning and final packing to be done this morning. I'm also checking, double checking then rechecking, trying to ensure I've not left anything behind, an unhealthy pastime of mine. I'm sure I have everything. Yes I have checked. Or... have I?
We're expected to clear the property by 1000. We manage this, only just. It's not like the owner is stood there giving us the side eye while leaning on a mop, it's more a matter of doing that which has been agreed. Anyway we've got 230 miles to cover, the sooner we get on the road the sooner we can get home.
Hopefully we've not trashed the rental.
The weather this morning is rather grey and overcast, there's a forecast for some rain but it ought not be too bad. We're not taking any interesting routes, this is merely the task of getting home. The A76 is fine I suppose although as we're heading south the skies are getting a little darker. We catch up with Rik in his car, towing his pink Harley with his pink rental trailer. I can't help but laugh, then the rain starts.
It's fine, it's regular rain. Then it gets a little heavier. Then it's absolutely tipping it down. Is it me or is Dumfries Tesco cursed? The last time we got to Dumfries Tesco to refuel and get a brew we were soaked. This time when we get to Dumfries Tesco to refuel and get a brew we are soaked once again. Once again we lob the bikes in any random space and rush inside. Guess what - Rik is here all dry and warm and comfortable. Pfffffft, git.
By the time we've rested and refreshed the rain outside is easing. That's good, but all the kit still has that moistness to it even though the waterproofs are doing their thing. Rik gets into his swish warm dry BMW, puts on the heater and the radio, then heads off. We slide our heads through the damp foam at the base of our helmets, don our soggy gloves, then remember we've left our keys in our pockets.
The A75 leads us towards the motorways, as it does it dries out and shows us the mountain tops of The Lake District across the bay. This weather is now teasing us with "look, here's what you'll be missing as you head home". Well fine, whatever, at least my boots and gloves are drying in the breeze.
There's just Sharon, Rob and myself now, Rik's shot off ahead. I turn off the M6 just south of Carlisle as the weather is now, errr, acceptable rather than lovely. I pull up and ask if anyone fancies another brew, we're in no rush. Rob knows a place, Lowther Castle, so I set sat-nav to take us there. It's terribly posh, more of a country mansion than a fortification. Tea and scones, that'll do nicely thank you.
Lowther Castle.
Coffee is nasty, I'm having my tea elsewhere.
Save for a pee break at Lancaster services where we say goodbye to Rob, that's it, all done.
Epilogue
No, the weather hasn't been perfect. I agree - 7 nights in one place is probably a bit too long. True, Ayrshire and Galloway are not as photogenic as The Highlands. But, but, but. There's nothing that can be done about the weather. We filled all 7 nights and days comfortably. Ayrshire and Galloway still has a lot of beauty and some jolly good roads too.
Portpatrick is lovely.
So will we be returning to Ayrshire and Galloway? Yes, absolutely. Regulars here know I love, adore, and endlessly espouse how wonderful, amazing, beautiful and majestic The Highlands are. Alas nothing is perfect though and The Highlands are not without their downsides these days.
Admittedly The Highlands has the wow factor.
The first issue with The Highlands is that they are a long way from Bolton. Admittedly it was 230 miles to Kilmarnock and it's only 260 miles to Tyndrum. That said it's 415 miles to Ullapool and 165 miles to Kirkcudbright, 2 towns that I really like. It's worth riding to Kirkcudbright for a long weekend, Ullapool requires a week unless you like ass-busting miles.
The second issue with The Highlands is the NC500. Oh my goodness the NC500 is (insert a long list of superlatives here) and I think it must be one of the greatest routes in the world. Which of course means every Tom, Dick, and Sally are up there too. Well keep away from the NC500 route? Alas this is what every Simon and Sarah is doing, trying to avoid the NC500 but still getting their fix of wonders. The Highlands are now bursting with motorcyclists, campervans, Winnebagos, and coaches.
Don't get me wrong, Ayrshire and Galloway are not without their tourists and the associated holiday parks and naff tat shops. At the time of writing though it did not feel like the area was swamped with Emmets such as myself. Once away from the conurbations and coastal resorts there's endless miles of good countryside riding, nice villages with cutesy tearooms, and scenery - scenery that is arguably more varied than The Highlands.
I will not try to argue Ayrshire and Galloway are "better" than The Highlands. What I will argue is the south-west of Scotland is more accessible, very pretty, and from a motorcyclist's point of view has some excellent roads to ride. It'll cost you less to get there and if you avoid the Scottish school holidays ought to be a tad cheaper and quieter too.
It's best if you avoid people like this too.
So what did we miss? I'm sure someone out there reading this will have thought to themselves "shoulda gone to X, the cafe at Y is fabulous, and the Z road from A to B is a cracker".
Epilogue By Sharon Parker
So would I go to Ayrshire and Galloway again? Yes if you were going I would come along. We had some good rides, but it would not be my first choice neither would it be my second etc. For me this destination was ok but it just did not give me that "oh wow" feeling I get with The Highlands. I need mountains, I need lochs and rivers and forests to make me feel I am having the best holiday. I accept not every holiday contains all these things and as such I would not want to limit myself to only holidays with those specific requirements.
I am also aware that I had other issues that may have tainted my overall enjoyment of this holiday. My confidence on the bike is still less than I want it to be after my accident and as such that affects my riding pleasure. I was also deeply worried about my sister and her battle with pancreatic cancer. Although you try your best to enjoy yourself you can not deny the worry that travels with you and this casts a shadow.
The above issues have to be taken into account with my general opinion of this holiday - as Ren seemed to find it far more enjoyable than myself.
Advertise here - contact ren@bikesandtravels.com
5 Fools For Kilmarnock - Prologue
The tales of mishap and trepidation leading up to this adventure is not for the faint hearted. Gird your loins we're only at the planning stage so far...
Bungling To The Bungalow
The first day of the South West Scotland Adventure is a total washout. Ren is moist and Sharon is leaking - and yet it's not all bad at the end of the day.
Let The Fun And Fretting Begin
It's the first ride out of the week, an easy one to get things going. Girvan provides the destination for a simple ride that'll get Ren fretting as usual.
Some Rain, A Unicorn, And Disorder
What is Ren doing today? No, he doesn't know either. Mist, rain, cafes and slippery roads are on the menu, plus there's a new member in the group.
5 Ferries In One Day
5 ferries? In one day!? Surely not (don't call me Shirley). That'll be 5 fools on 5 bikes attempting to use 5 different ferries. What could possibly go wrong? Not a lot thankfully.
The Rhins Of Galloway
It's another grand day out for 5 fools in Kilmarnock. There's sunshine, forest, hills, a lighthouse, and a harbour. There's also guilt, a lack of tea, and all kinds of strange places.
The Kelpies - Again
It's Deja-Vu time for Ren and Sharon. It's traffic and town riding too. Sharon manages to find some lovely green stuff to brighten the day.
Bigger Scenery South Of Biggar
Sharon has suggested today's destination with Ren putting in an add-on. It's a part of the UK less explored, which is a shame, but at least it's quiet.
Homeward Bound And Epilogues
Alas it's time to go home. The weather gives Ren deja-vu and there's a moment for a little more cake. Both Sharon and Ren sum up their feelings about the area.
Reader's Comments
Upt'North ¹ said :-
There's always time for cake. If there ain't, some'ats up.
I do like D and G, I've said it before, probably here? But, it ain't the Highlands, but as you succinctly put it, that's the problem, innit.
We're off to Skye in May but it'll be a four wheeled trip and hiking aplenty to boot. But we've made sure we're on the West Coast away from the ferry to bridge crowd who are "doing Skye". Whatever that means?
And then there's another but, some will say until you've been to Tongue, Bettyhill and Gairloch you haven't seen the Highlands anyway so when do you stop going North, when your feet get wet? Life's a quandary, but only if you let it be so, make time to go where you want and see those places with your own eyes. Who said, "there's one life, live it"? Easy to say but sometimes much harder to achieve.
Thanks you pair of rascals and stay away from men on pink bikes.
Upt.
09/01/2026 12:45:53 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
Oh yes, those tables aren't inline and the window's open.
09/01/2026 12:48:10 UTC
Ian Soady¹ said :-
Ah, but do you put the cream on first or the jam? I also understand that some odd folk don't bother with the butter. The more saturated fat and sugar the better as far as I'm concerned.
I'm the same when leaving a place - I always think I've forgotten something. I've probably mentioned this before but I was on the Tiger one early morning leaving the small Ouistreham hotel I'd stayed in before a ferry. I'd split the Tiger's keys between 2 rings - one for ignition / top box, the other for panniers etc as I hate great bunches of keys rattling about. Of course I zoomed off to the ferry leaving the pannier keys on the steps outside the hotel.
I didn't realise till I was on the ferry and went to get some comfy shoes for the trip out of a pannier. Not really a problem but I'd have to wait till I got home for the spares. However, as I was enjoying a cup of Brittany ferries' excellent coffee, a bloke came up to me waving some keys and saying "are these yours?" He'd spotted them on the steps as I left but missed me in the ferry queue. Nice chap - he could easily have just left them there.
09/01/2026 14:17:11 UTC
Ren - The Ed¹ said :-
Blimey Ian that's LUCKY!!
I have a massive set of key but with a carabiner. On the carabiner the bike key alone comes off, then one set of house keys and one set of bike security keys. I also have a spare bike key, disc lock key, top box key and house key secured "elsewhere" in case I lose the set.
Oh that feeling when you've lost your keys, it's like nausea, panic, dizziness and disbelief. Same when you've lost ya wallet.
The window is open Upt' to allow the smell of roughty toughty mean and well'ard bikers to leave the room. Fear not the owner of the property lives nearby and would soon be there to secure the place. Tables? Pfffft, nerd.
09/01/2026 17:46:52 UTC
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Travel Stories5 Fools In South West Scotland