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Travel Stories5 Fools In South West Scotland
The Kelpies - Again
Ride Date 12 June 2025
By Ren Withnell
We did kind of know a full 7 nights in one place might be an issue. 4 nights would have been better but logistics and booking complications meant 7 nights was the most manageable choice. Today is Thursday. We've been North to Wemyss Bay and Clyde Muirshiel Regional Park, West across the waters, and South to The Rhins of Galloway. East?
North is Glasgow and we are NOT interested in city traffic. Then some plonker (not me for a change) mentions The Kelpies. Yeah, right. Across town, or dull busy motorways, more town riding - just to see some big steel horses that I've already seen twice before. But it's not about me is it. Sharon's seen them, the rest haven't. No, no I don't have any better ideas either. Looks like we're going to The Kelpies. Again.
Find me a nice route across this lot.
There's a change in our group. On Tuesday Mark got a call to say his mother had been hit by a car - while she was walking on the pavement. She's elderly and frail and while it doesn't seem terminal she's been sedated while she's stabilising. I can't give you much more detail than that really. Mark has obviously been worried but decided he'd remain with us for a few days as his sister is there and there's nothing that can be done.
It seems she's past the absolute worst and the hospital will be easing the sedation. As such what with him being worried and the fact she'll likely be conscious he's decided he'll ride home today. I feel sorry for the guy, I lost my own mother recently so I can understand his concerns, plus that he's losing a few days of a holiday he's been very much looking forward to. Safe home Mark.
We're riding north of Kilmarnock and it's nice enough. We're on open moorland among hardy grasses, passing wind turbines and moving swiftly, maybe this won't be so bad after all? Nah. East Kilbride soon reminds us clearly that not all of Scotland is fabulous forests, rocky ranges, majestic mountains, and captivating corners. There are plenty of regular roads, run-of-the-mill roundabouts, boring boulevards, and dull drives. Hamilton and Bellshill offer little in contrast.
At one of many many traffic lights Sharon pipes up from the back seat "I suppose it's good to see this..." then the lights change. I get her point - if all you ever saw of Scotland were majestic mountains and fabulous forests you might get to thinking Scotland is ONLY majestic mountains and fabulous forests. Today is clearly reminding us Scotland has cities and towns and people and shops and industrial estates and traffic jams and everything else modern life throws at us.
It also brings into focus how lucky we are to get to avoid these things.
We eventually fall out of the towns and onto the remarkably contrasting B803. I mean it's not The Highlands but at least we're in the countryside among the cows and the fields, which is nice. There's a lot of countryside here, alas we're soon back among the throngs as we pass through Falkirk.
I'm getting Deja Vu.
Nice weather, tourist attraction, big car parks, lots and lots of people. Yep we're at The Kelpies. The parking attendant is super friendly yet still relieves us all of a couple of quid per bike to park. However he also invites us to leave our helmets in his cabin, we gratefully accept his kind offer. It's a stroll from the car park to the massive stainless steel artsy thingies, alongside the canal, beside far too many people for my liking.
I think you might have a leak mate.
Tea? Rik says "I'll get this" but is soon regretting his kindness as his credit card takes a battering. The sun is out and the air is warming rapidly, we strip off as we struggle to find a place to sit. There's a que for the loo and kids running around. And, in spite of all this, I am still happy. Why? Because I'm here chatting with my friends, not stuck at work. Because I'm out on the bike. Because I have a brew. Just because.
We don't stay long. We wander back past the massive horse thingies and back to the bikes. We've been, we've seen, that's enough. We're looking at the maps and there's a patch of green stuff east of here and central to it is "Carron Valley Reservoir" - not to be confused with Loch Carron. It's not exactly on route back but meh - we'll give it a shot and see what we find.
Well I mean it looks green?
It's a dull drag back through Falkirk and Denny, then we magically pop out into the countryside once again and all is well with the world, I can breathe! Trees and hills and cows and fields and green stuff. The B818 moves gracefully and peacefully by farms as the gentle hills become more bulbous and remote. I'm surprised, considering we were deep in town traffic not long since.
Carron Valley Reservoir is rather pretty. We stop for a stretch and to get some snapshots, I notice it is peaceful here. There's some houses beside the road and a solitary builder going about his business, otherwise the only noises are ourselves and nature's. We're merely 8 miles from a town, fascinating.
It's turning out alright this route ain't it.
The further along the B818 we get the more remote and wild the scenery becomes. With hazy skies and ideal temperatures, a quiet road twisting through fields and trees and moors, and a previous expectation of nothing but city riding I'd argue this is turning out far better than expected. The B822 towards Lennoxtown is even better - providing that wonderful mix of nadgery corners and delightful views.
Alas all good things shall pass. Lennoxtown brings us back into "civilisation" and traffic. I know not how we get into the main conurbations of Glasgow and I care not either. Sat-nav drags us through all the usual type of places you'd expect and that look like we could be in any built up area in the UK. Glasgow ain't a bad place, it ain't a good place either. It's a city like any other. We stop at a Tesco Express to get tonight's meal, we could be anywhere.
At least the motorway should get us through the worst of it. You'd hope so but like any other city even the motorways crawl. The innumerable lanes are confusing, no matter which one you choose it feels like a 70% chance you've chosen the wrong one. Keeping 3 bikes together precludes me from any serious filtering so I, we just plod on. It's a grind, just get on with it.
When the M77 scrabbles out of Glasgow towards Kilmarnock the traffic eases and the distance markers to Kilmarnock fall at a satisfactory pace. By the time we're back at the bungalow my ass is well and truly ready for a rest and I need a brew. To be honest I think we're all a bit worn out - we've done around 130 miles but in traffic? I bet we've ridden for 6 or 7 hours.
After dining and chilling and chatting the evening is soon gone once again. Oh my, what a terrifying thought - tomorrow is out last full day here! Yes, OK, today involved a lot of not exactly brilliant riding - but we also got to enjoy some countryside too. Added to this the expected poor weather kept at bay, it felt like it might rain, it did occasionally, but for the most part we've been lucky.
By Sharon Parker
As we are off to the Kelpies today I decide it will be a pillion day for me today as I have ridden to the Kelpies before. Ok this is a different route etc but the ride from here to there does not look that exciting and besides I like to mix it up.
The Kelpies look as good as ever and are weathering the elements well it seems. Rob asks me to put my hand into a fist and do an undercut motion. I'm confused... like why? I do it anyway and then I realise why. He has got me to chin a Kelpie.
Rob made me do it.
None of us really know what to do after our visit here. The sun is out so it'd be a shame just to head back to the bungalow. Unusually I look for a route on my phone and seeing something akin to hills I come up with a plan and show my suggested route to everyone. No one has any better ideas so my route is put into everyone's navigation device and off we go.
My route is actually a good one, even if I say so myself and I begin to wish I was actually on my own bike now. Oh well I get to have a really good look at the most pleasant views when not riding.
Carron Valley reservoir proves the perfect place for a stop and admire the view whilst stretching the legs.
The 3 Stooges.
The route to Campsie Glen Crow Road car park is delightful. The ferns are growing thick and lush here however they do not manage to conceal a burnt out car. A pair of very talkative chaps tell us the tales of some rowdy goings on, so it would appear that the quiet peacefulness of this place is shattered on occasion.
Beautiful but be careful of what lurks beneath.
Another biker is here, a quietly spoken laid back chap on an older smaller cc motorbike just chilling and enjoying a day out in the sunshine. I like meeting and talking to people like him. No posturing, no ego, just a man at ease with himself. This ease is easier to come by with age but it does not come to us all and I am always grateful to be around those who are graced by it.
Talking of ego, I still find myself feeling a little "less" when I meet fellow bikers while I myself am not riding my own bike. Like oh no they don't know I ride my own! Obviously my own ego is still a work in progress.
Advertise here - contact ren@bikesandtravels.com
5 Fools For Kilmarnock - Prologue
The tales of mishap and trepidation leading up to this adventure is not for the faint hearted. Gird your loins we're only at the planning stage so far...
Bungling To The Bungalow
The first day of the South West Scotland Adventure is a total washout. Ren is moist and Sharon is leaking - and yet it's not all bad at the end of the day.
Let The Fun And Fretting Begin
It's the first ride out of the week, an easy one to get things going. Girvan provides the destination for a simple ride that'll get Ren fretting as usual.
Some Rain, A Unicorn, And Disorder
What is Ren doing today? No, he doesn't know either. Mist, rain, cafes and slippery roads are on the menu, plus there's a new member in the group.
5 Ferries In One Day
5 ferries? In one day!? Surely not (don't call me Shirley). That'll be 5 fools on 5 bikes attempting to use 5 different ferries. What could possibly go wrong? Not a lot thankfully.
The Rhins Of Galloway
It's another grand day out for 5 fools in Kilmarnock. There's sunshine, forest, hills, a lighthouse, and a harbour. There's also guilt, a lack of tea, and all kinds of strange places.
The Kelpies - Again
It's Deja-Vu time for Ren and Sharon. It's traffic and town riding too. Sharon manages to find some lovely green stuff to brighten the day.
Reader's Comments
Upt'North ¹ said :-
Long way to travel to see a horses head, OK two old nags heads.
But then again, Sicily is a long way to ride for a pizza.
Pffffffftttttt.
Upt.
31/10/2025 18:05:00 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
Been thinking why we rode that far for a pizza. There were pistachio cannoli's and good coffee too.
It all makes sense now.
01/11/2025 09:45:09 UTC
Ian Soady¹ said :-
I saw the kelpies a few years ago and was impressed. In the same area is the Falkirk boat lift which is a brilliant piece of engineering - didn't you go there?
01/11/2025 10:01:14 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
The boat lift is remarkable Ian.
01/11/2025 12:37:06 UTC
Ren - The Ed¹ said :-
I've been and seen the boat lift - see link. I found the engineering fascinating but the fascination was tainted by the tourism and commercialisation of the experience. I totally accept that these places need to be managed with paid for parking, appropriate cafes, shops and facilities, and that the locality should benefit from the visitors. That doesn't mean I want to be herded into managed car parks, directed through the cafes, nor contribute to the local economy. I wish them all great success.
https://bikesandtravels.com/biker.aspx?ride=803...
01/11/2025 15:43:04 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
I think you're describing being a tourist Ed.
Although I'm struggling to remember ever paying for parking on the bike here or abroad. They probably pick on you suvverners.
01/11/2025 18:54:14 UTC
Ren - The Ed¹ said :-
Yes Upt' you're quite right. And like many tourists I don't like to think of myself as a tourist, I don't like to think of myself as being "one of them lot". I'm different, I'm not a tourist I'm, errr, I'm an explorer, I'm a traveller. In truth I'm a tourist who happens to choose a motorcycle rather than a train or a car or a bus.
Dagnammit!
03/11/2025 08:08:39 UTC
Upt'North ¹ said :-
Train you say Ed.
Would you fancy that, as a tourist I mean, not going to Salford to buy a new string vest.
I think it could be an interesting way to travel through Europe, obviously your destinations will be limited, what do think? Maybe when you're old and wrinkly....2026 perhaps.
Upt.
03/11/2025 08:42:31 UTC
Scot-in-exile said :-
The Kelpies are much better viewed after the sun goes down but not ideal when you have a long ride home afterwards. The route around the Carron Valley was a frequent ride out from my younger days.
Had you turned right, instead of left, at the end of the B818, you could have visited Fintry, a very upmarket village, where there are a few excellent cafes to be found.
03/11/2025 19:26:13 UTC
Ren - The Ed¹ said :-
Ahhh the benefits on local knowledge Scot-in-exile. We didn't make it to Fintry but I've just had a look on Google street view and it looks like a lovely little village in the hills.
04/11/2025 09:36:54 UTC
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Travel Stories5 Fools In South West Scotland