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Winter Camping Fail
Blog Date - 08 December 2014
The Reason.
I'm planning a trip to Scotland in winter, hopefully early 2015. As such I want to keep my camping hand in and also ensure my equipment is up to the task. I didn't want to ride up to Scotland on a cold, wet and wintry day only to find my so-called 4 season sleeping bag is nigh on useless. I can handle a bit of cold but a week freezing my nuts off all night, that's just a bit too much.
The Plan.
Ride to a campsite I found on ukcampsites.co.uk that claims to be open all year. The campsite is in North Wales.
Put the tent up.
Make some tea.
Spend the evening bored out of my mind wishing I had a data signal on my phone.
Go to sleep at 2200.
See if I am nice and warm or frozen solid.
Come home and make adjustments as required.
The Reality.
Let's make on thing clear. It's all the gf's fault. It's always the gf's fault. I take no responsibility.Even if it IS my fault it's her fault. Remember that.
Saturday.
The gf's decided she's coming with me. She's just got a new sleeping bag too and she'd like to try it out in some proper weather, none of this warm summer nonsense. I fear that she may be letting herself in for something a lot lot less fun than she hopes. Still, she's a big girl now with her own sleeping bag and her own motorcycle too. It's up to her (ie it's her fault).
That evening we're at a party and everyone thinks we are stark raving mad to go camping tomorrow. The forecast is wet, cold, windy and there's a big risk of snow. I explain the reasoning. No-one thinks it's a good idea, they all recommend a hotel. That's great but it won't tell me if my sleeping bag is any good now will it.
Sunday.
Looking at the forecast I'm starting to think it's not a good idea either. It's cold in the house so lord only knows what it's going to be like out there. I need to keep an eye on the time too as it goes dark at 1600 right now and putting the tent up in the dark is a right pain in the backside. The gf surfaces at 1100. SHE....SHE accuses ME of not waking her up in time! Oh like I'm her time keeper, like I'm responsible for when she wakes up. Pffffft. I hadn't planned to leave until 1200 but that's beside the point. Anyhow it takes her an age to get ready, it's 1230 before we're loading the bikes up.
Ready to roll...eventually.
Out on the road it's not actually too bad. We are both wrapped up so much we look like two over inflated balloons. While looking sexy is not possible we are both actually quite warm out here. We potter our way down through Leigh and out towards Knutsford. I'm dithering. North Wales? It's a long way. We were there the other day. I should have called that campsite to make sure it's open. It's in the hills, we could get snowed in.
It's not far to Buxton and I saw an all year campsite listed there too. We've not been to Derbyshire for a while. Buxton's a proper town too, there'll be shops and pubs and stuff. But I said North Wales. I've planned out how to get to the campsite. But, but, but... I'm dithering. I dither long enough to make sure I'm on the road to Macclesfield. Oh dear, how did that happen? It makes sense now to got to Buxton not North Wales. It's the gf's fault, she must be cold and tired already. I'm only doing it for her, because it's closer you see.
Again it's the gf's fault I take the wrong road and end up in Alderly Edge. You see I was so busy making sure she was safe behind me that I ended up in the wrong lane. Not to worry, I can still get to Macclesfield and the Cat And Fiddle Pass from here. I spot a coffee shop and pull in for a warm and to check the website and maps, to make sure I know how to get to this here campsite in Buxton.
My phone crashes whenever I access the ukcampsite.co.uk map page. Oh poop, that's not good. By some miracle the gf's even cheaper mobile works just fine though and soon enough I know exactly which road the campsite is on. I've been along that road a few times, it's a good road, almost as good as the Cat And Fiddle Pass itself. We warm up, drink tea, use the toilets and re-wrap ourselves up in the endless layers, making sure to seal up any draughts and leaks.
As we start to climb out of Macclesfield I notice a couple of cars coming down the hill covered in an inch of bona-fide snow. Crap. It's only now I remember a post on facebook showing snow in Castleton, not too far from Buxton. Oh what have I done?! It's the gf's fault, if she'd got up earlier, if I'd not been trying to find a shorter ride for her. Yeah, it her fault.
As we reach the Cat And Fiddle Pub there's just a dusting of snow and hail stones lying at the edge of the road and the car park. Meh, it's nothing to worry about except the gf slips just a little as we ride back out of the car park. It not looking good though. Each time it rains there's snow in the mix and I can feel the temperature dropping, the clouds thickening and the weather closing in. This is starting to look less and less like a good idea.
The Cat And Fiddle Pass, looking as welcoming as ever.
We turn a corner. It's like we've turned into another country. Snow. Not thick snow, not yet. Tufts of grass poke out between the white layer and rocks are still a mix of black and white. But snow, a lot more snow than I expected. The road has a line of slush down the middle, we have to ride in the tracks made by the cars. Of course the Audi behind us thinks it's still warm, dry, grippy and safe. He tailgates the gf for a while then passes her and tailgates me. I slow down. He gets closer. I slow down some more. He get's closer still. I slow down some more, we are crawling now. He gets the message and backs off, a little.
On the slushy white roads of Buxton I find the A5004 without issue. The issue is the corner. There's just a small patch of slush that has been compacted into globs of ice. I stop gingerly, hoping the gf stops just as delicately too. With my feet out I tip toe across the lumps of ice while feathering the throttle and reach the relative safety of the just a bit slushy tracks on the main road. I stop in the slush at the side and prey the gf stays upright. It takes her a while but she finally passes me, sensibly refusing to stop with me in the slush. Damn this is scary now.
My hope is that the campsite is but a few hundred yards out of town. While all the other traffic still seems to be moving at everyday speeds I ride at 20 mph, climbing the hill and expecting at any moment for a tyre to break loose. I also wonder if any of these vans, cars, trucks and buses will break loose and plough into the both of us. I don't think people in boxes have any notion at all about road conditions, grip and risk.
Where the hell is this campsite? Is that it? No, that looks like a grand house entrance. The snow comes down. Is that it? Something to do with the outdoors but I can't read it as the snow stings my eyes. Is that it? Oh crap! There's a clump of snow across the tracks where it's fallen off a car roof. Damn, missed that sign. Whoa! A large transit van splashes slush into us, overtaking as we crawl along. This is hard work, lord only know what's going on in the gf's head.
A few miles out of town it becomes obvious that we've missed the campsite. We turn another corner and as if by magic all the snow is gone again! What? Buxton appears to be in the grip of deepest winter while the rest of the world is having a couple of hail showers. How odd. I pull into a layby to consult with the gf.
Me, I'm dithering, again. I'm sure we could ride back and find the campsite but I really don't like the idea of going back into the snow. It must be off the main road, would a side road even be navigable? What if either of us has a spill? What if another of the stupid, ignorant and thick cagers makes a mistake and wipes us out? The poor gf, who always suffers in the cold, she must be exhausted. She's never ridden in such terrible conditions either, she must be scared out of her wits. But...but...I've never camped in snow. It would be a good test for the sleeping bags. I stand a very good chance of hitting snow in Scotland, now is the time to learn. But....but........but.
The gf, rather annoyingly, seems fine. She's not scared by the roads, stating that it's OK as long as we're careful. She's a bit chilly but not hypothermic or anything. She's quite happy to turn around and look for the campsite. Damn. Perhaps she doesn't understand the risk. Perhaps she doesn't sense just how bloody slippery the roads are. Yeah, that's it. No, no we'll carry on back towards Manchester and see what happens from there. Yeah. I'm looking after her. It's her fault we don't find the campsite. Yeah. Her fault.
It's getting dark too and quickly. The road twists it's way back to Whaley Bridge and as we ride through the village you wouldn't know it was winter let alone that 7 miles back down the road it was starting to look like Lapland. Here it's just another cold wet evening. I stop and in a last ditch effort to save face I ask the gf for her phone to see if we can find a campsite nearby. The rain soaks the screen and my numb fingers can't operate the tiny little keypad. I give up and hand the phone back before the rain finds it's way inside and fries it. I need a pee too.
We stop at a pub along the A6 outside of Stockport and go in for a pee and a warm and a cup of tea. Everything is better with a cup of tea. A log fire pops and crackles as we sip the warm brew. I look at the gf's phone. There's no campsites nearby. There's a couple up towards Delph but it's dark, I'll never find them and even the gf says it's getting late now. Yeah, yeah, that's right sweetie, it's too late and too dark now. Lets go home.
For goodness sake woman...look miserable!
The ride home involves me getting lost around Handforth, Manchester Airport, Wythenshawe and even the god-forsaken hell that is The Trafford Centre. By the time I reach Eccles and I know exactly where I am I must say that I'm cold, tired and ready to get home. We arrive back at my place at 1900. We're both in agreement that we've survived the day and enjoyed the ride but those last 10 miles were hard work. I rustle up some chicken curry out of a tin.
What I've Learned.
The day has been a failure. I've let myself down as I didn't achieve my goal. I spent the night in my own bed with my electric blanket, not in a cold tent finding out if the new sleeping bag works. It's all the gf's fault of course. You see I was thinking of her. I was worried about her. I didn't want to push her too hard. I didn't want her to find out just how slippery snow is. Oh yeah yeah yeah, she'll tell you how easy it was riding through the slush, she'll tell you how she managed to stay warm, she'll tell you how tough she is. Look....right...it's her fault not mine...OK. Just accept it will ya and shut up.
But looking back it's not been a total failure, just a learning curve. The point is to prepare for Scotland in Winter. I have learned some very valuable lessons.
Firstly, I've re-learned that snow does scare me. Maybe I'm a chicken, maybe it's years of riding push bikes and motorcycles in snow. Maybe it's all the times I've had an off on snow. But it scares me. So, if I'm in Scotland and there's a forecast of snow I need to make sure I am somewhere safe BEFORE it catches me up. Rain, no problem, cold, no problem but ice and snow? I need to ensure that I find a place to camp that is near a town so I can get food and supplies. I need to be somewhere such that if the snow gets severe I can walk into town and find emergency shelter. I need to be prepared.
I need to plan, and stick to my plan within reason. I need to know which campsites will be open and how to find them. There's no point arriving at an area as big as the Scottish Highlands thinking I can just ride around a little bit and sure enough I'll happen upon a campsite that is open through winter. You make your own luck and preparation is part of that luck. Wandering around the vast open wilderness on a 125 in winter is not something to be taken light-heartedly.
I need to sort out my information stream. There's no point in having a mobile with me that can't access the websites with the important details. Do I buy a new phone or perhaps a new tablet? Do I take my netbook? Is there a list of wi-fi hotspots in Scotland?
I need to make sure I'm looking for a place to pitch long before it's dark. Finding campsites is hard enough on a cold and wet day, finding them when it's cold, wet and dark will make life even more difficult. Putting the tent up in the dark is a faff too, especially if it turns out I can't get the bike nearby to shine a headlight on the issue.
And Finally
I still plan to fulfil my testing. Next weekend I think I'll just go to a campsite I know. That way I stand a far better chance of completing the task of checking out the warmth of the sleeping bag. It'll be my luck that next weekend will be warm and dry. It's all the gf's fault. Don't forget that folks, it's all her fault.
Reader's Comments
Think you know who I am said :-
Get a sat nav and save time ....... It's the future
01/01/2000 00:00:00 UTC
Rob G said :-
Why don't you just wait till its really bad and pitch in my back garden, that way if you do find it to be to hard you can just come inside.
01/01/2000 00:00:00 UTC
Ren - The Ed said :-
Aww cheers Rob! Trouble is if it did get too much not so sure you're fiancée would let us in!
01/01/2000 00:00:00 UTC
Loopy said :-
Take Ordnance Survey maps, there's no use in relying on a mobile signal in the Highlands and god forbid something happens to the SatNav....stick to a paper backup! And.....always listen to the gf!
Why didn't you just set your tent up in the your or the gf's garden...at least you would have the option of the electric blanket if the bags are too lightweight
01/01/2000 00:00:00 UTC
Ren - The Ed said :-
Hi Loopy. With regards to maps, sat-nav and the Highlands. Yes you're quite right in that anything electrical just can't be trusted! Rain does terrible things to fancy dancy gadgets. Paper maps can get soggy though, but usually they'll survive somehow. However I'm very fortunate that I know the routes I wish to take quite well.
There is a problem camping in my own or the gf's garden. I, I don't have a garden. We could have camped in the shed but it's not the same really. The gf does have a garden but the only patch of grass she has is by the side of the road. It's a bit...well...surreal camping next to the house she lives in with all the neighbours watching.
We had a ride out and that's what matters most :-)
01/01/2000 00:00:00 UTC
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